Depression ≠ Suicidal

It’s not the same. They aren’t synonymous.

When a person says they have depression, those that hear automatically assume that person has tried (or will) to commit suicide. I myself, am guilty of this in my past. But things changed.

Sometimes I think it would be better if I was simply dead. Sometimes I wish I was, and even dream of it. But that doesn’t mean I’m gonna do it.

When you are depressed, it means you feel dead inside. You feel like you have no future.

When you are suicidal, you’ve already given up. You have no hope. And therefore, no reason to go on.

I want to live. I want to have reason to live. I want to laugh, and have a future. And I will be damned if I give up now.

So even though I feel worthless, I still have hope. I still think I can be something, someone; that I will find value. I don’t like being an empty shell. So I will keep searching until I am no longer empty.

I have chronic depression, yes. But I am not going to commit suicide.

I refuse.

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